22.08.08 :: wait a minute, i thought i ordered rainbow sprinkles ...

i'd almost forgotten to mention that yesterday marked the 1-year anniversary of my quitting smoking. so far, so good. and then i saw this on the soup. good thing i didn't see it before i quit. i might just have two habits on my hands. sheesh!!

posted by lonestarsteve on fri 22.08.08 5:54 AM

i'm all for straight guys designing clothes for women. that's great. the more the merrier, honestly. but when one straight guy—while in the company of an entire butt-load of fags—each get the opportunity to design an outfit for a freakin' drag queen, and it is the straight guy who takes the prize? well, my friends, all signs point to the apocalypse being dangerously near. i'm just sayin'.

even tim gunn wrote in his blog: "isn't it ironic that our only hetero male would win this challenge?" i whole-heartedly agree, tim.

last night's episode 6 of project runway, entitled "good queen fun," was such a sign from god. you must remember that every season of pr had at least one designer of the straight persuasion. remember robert plotkin from season 1? he made it pretty far, actually. almost to fashion week, much to fellow designer wendy pepper's chagrin.

and who could forget season 2's daniel franco, who was the only designer ever to be auf'ed from two different seasons of the show. of course, the jury is still out on franco as far as his sexuality (by the way, the kids are no longer saying bisexual. the hip phrase now is polyamorous). but nevertheless, franco did have that crushing scene during the finale where he weirded out host heidi klum by telling her that he loved her. and then that long, awkward silence. that must proove something, right?

season 3 brought none other than retired designer vincent libretti. you remember vincent? he's the one who wrapped a model in a giant toilet tissue roll and called it evening attire? and libretti, much like franco, was given a second chance and still blew it!

then when season 4 swung around, we were introduced to kevin christiana. i don't even remember much of what kevin designed during his short stint on the show, and it just aired last year. but, i don't seem to recall him winning any of the challenges before being auf'ed.

which leads me back to last night. how in the world did it happen? how did season 5's token straight guy joe faris from troy, michigan, of all places, pull out a win over all those other gay guys while designing an outfit for a drag queen? i'm speechless. utterly speechless.

don't get me wrong. i'm not saying that faris didn't deserve to win last night because he's straight, i just think that one of those queens should have stepped up to the plate and pulled something wonderfully gay and magical from their pink-faux fur-lined bag of tricks.

that said, i really did enjoy last night's episode regardless. it was great getting to see some of new york city's finest drag queens getting new looks. each drag client had their own persona and design asthetic that each designer tried acknowledge, accept, understand, and then eventually disregard and completely work around. what fun!

making a special guest appearance last night to announce the challenge was none other than season 4's chris march, who entered the runway wearing an exaggerated valkyrian outfit. march tells designers, "fashion is all about putting on a show. so be as theatrical and over-the-top as you can be." armed with a $200 budget and 2 days to work, the 11 remaining designers head to mood for fabric, er, for feathers and sequins.

winner last night was none other than joe for his sailor-inspired pink sequined catsuit for "southern ann margaret on steroids," varla jean mermon. the body-hugging pantsuit showed off ms. mermon's best assets while concealing her "man candy" with a strategically placed, low-rise matching pink belt. congratulations, joe! the rapture may be nearby, but at least you got your time in the sun.

getting auf'ed—and who are we really kidding when we say he didn't have it coming—was daniel. this was daniel's third trip in a row to the bottom tier of the runway, so his being kicked out was long overdue, in my opinion. his look for annida greenkard was boring and forgettable.

my friend, kaye sidilla, agrees with me when i say that during the last two episodes, daniel would appear as though he were under the influence of some type of drug or medication, what with all his sweating and wild eye movements. just an observation. but maybe it contributed to his lack of focus. best of luck, daniel. good luck with wesley.

joe: true sign of the apocalypse. a straight guy won a drag queen costume design challenge.	daniel: three strikes your out, honey. give wesley a big ol' wet kiss for us.

the other designers did a really great job. below are the other looks, in the order that i liked them...

001: terri for acid betty	oo2: korto for sweetie	003: jerell for lemay	004: blayne for miss understood
005: leanne for sharon needles	006: kenley for farrah moans	007: suede for hedda lettuce	oo8: stella for luisa verde

and last but not least, keith designed this atrocity for sherry vine. fringe, fringe, fringe, pieces here, pieces there, swatches, swatches, swatches ...

i don't know, keith. you have your place in this business, for sure, but you're going to have to listen to suggestions given you. your look for sherry vine was just as jerell called it out to be: a wookie onesie!

tim writes in his blog: "[keith] designed a mini-dress that was expressly intended to expose sherry's bra and panties, which is evidently a sherry vine signature (go figure?). i was concerned about the possible vulgarity of this display, and keith assured me that he had reeled in this request and that the panties wouldn't show. this look was topped by a stole (or sorts) made out of strips of black, white, and gray fabric, and this treatment was echoed over the skirt. this led to a potent issue for the judges: keith's repeated use, challenge after challenge, of this layering method. they're simply tired of it and want to see what else he can achieve."

judge heidi klum called keith's look "random and unpolished." judge nina garcia called it "a puzzle" that she couldn't figure out. and judge michael kors said that it reminded him of "a sad, gray chicken."

hilarious. thank you, project runway, for another great episode.

posted by lonestarsteve on thu 21.08.08 8:01 AM

i finally broke down and got one. i absolutely had to, and i'll tell you two reasons why.

first, my current phone, a motorola razr, has completely stopped working. i can no longer answer a call and talk to anyone through the handset. i can only use the speakerphone option, which is simply unacceptable. the razr was my fifth (and last) flip-style phone in 5 years, and i'm now convinced that unbendable phones -- of any brand -- are the way to go. for reliability, anyway.

secondly, i was able to score the iphone from a friend at a discount. after having the 8GB model for 3 months, he was ready to move on to the 16GB model, so he offered me his. totally awesome.

this means, of course, that i've had to leave t-mobile and join at&t, which could be a good thing, or could be bad. too soon to tell.

let me know your thoughts about this if you've got any.

posted by lonestarsteve on tue 19.08.08 7:24 AM

what can i say? there's a real jungle between wendy healy and her calvins. needless to say i really loved tonight's 5th episode of pr, entitled "welcome to the jungle." first of all, i absolutely adore brooke shields. she's stylish and sweet and so down to earth and genuine. such a great pick for a guest judge. bravo, bravo!

the remaining 12 designers had to pair up for this challenge, which caused some sparks to fly, which, quite honestly, is why i love this show. only through conflict, after all, comes clarity and greatness. [girl, can you believe i just make this sh*t up on the fly? damn.]

but i digress...

the 6 teams were then presented their challenge: create a day-to-evening look for a "high-powered, glamorous professional woman." and not just any high-powered, glamorous professional woman: but something that brooke shields' character on lipstick jungle, wendy healy, would wear. and, turns out, she really will wear the winning outfit, actually, in the show's upcoming second season. therefore, no immunity was awarded for this challenge. [remember: korto has immunity for this challenge from winning last week's "rings of glory" challenge.]

then the designers were given the usual 30 minutes to sketch and then pitched their ideas to brooke. after seeing the dozen looks, brooke chose her six top favorites: these were keith, korto, jerell, kelli, terri, and blayne, in that order.

designers then chose partners, in this order: tanned blayne picks pale leanne; butch-gay keith chooses silly kenley; tough terri chooses the-designer-only-known-to-himself-as-suede; korto, last week's winner, picks straight-boy joe; straightforward, tattooed kelli decides to pair with meek (and high for this episode?) daniel; and cool jerell ends up with stella, the queen of "lethuh."

armed with $150 and one day to complete the challenge, the designers then hit mood for fabric and notions (my neighbor loves when i say "notions." holla at cha mare-mare!). tim gunn writes in his blog: "regarding the collaborative and synergistic dimensions within each team, there was rampant strife, consternation, and conflict." see, i told you there was conflict. she don't lie.

keith: first win. congrats, you butch fag, you.	kelli: slutty, slutty, slutty. auf on you!

keith pulls out the win for this challenge. and i must say, deservedly so. his outfit fit perfectly into what brooke explained that she wanted. teamed with kenley, keith didn't win without incident. tim explains in his blog, the trouble all began at the fabric store (count all the 10-cent vocabulary words, now):

"their conflict began at mood where kenley acted as though she was the leader and bullied keith to such an extent that I needed to step in and mediate. her intractability coupled with her shrillness made her an exhausting opponent. her cause célèbre was a floral print that she selected versus a floral print of keith's.

"for me there was no contest: keith's print was sophisticated and polished whereas kenley's was 'ma kettle.' i advised that they should purchase both of them, providing that their budget allowed, and debate this into resolution in the workroom.

"in the end, keith won and, indeed, his design won. a high-waisted petal pencil skirt in diaphanous chocolate fabric served as a pedestal for the floral chiffon top. a wide black belt softened the transition between the two pieces. owing to the high-end elegance of the look, i found it more difficult to see the day-to-evening transition, but the judges swooned and brooke loved it."

the decisioin to auf kelli over daniel really perplexes me. i thought kelli would continue over the course of this season to gain the favor of the judges, particularly heidi. but her taste level was way off with this outfit. brooke actually commented that it was the shape of the dress that was the unfortunate part, making it look cheaper than i could have looked. tim writes of kelli and daniel's pairing in his blog:

"the lion's share of the fabric chosen was black. it was punctuated with leopard (brooke had cautioned kelli: 'watch the leopard!') and some odd blue fabric on the bustline that looked like a non sequitur.

"daniel was assigned the construction of a black pencil skirt with ruching, but, owing to myriad mishaps, it took two-plus attempts to get it right. kelli worked on a kelli-esque bustier top that incorporated the leopard.

"the day-to-evening transition was offered through a shrunken jacket with a 360-degree peplum: it comes off at night. what was impossible to overcome was how cheap and tawdry the outfit looked, especially the bare midriff: brooke's character would look like a hooker, not a power broker."

just a side note, but according to a text i received from kenley via bravo tv shortly after the show, she explained why she laughed so much at one point on the runway during judging. she says, "between daniel sweating profusely, michael kors' face, and the awkward silence on the runway, it was hilarious to me. the whole situation cracks me up."

that's true, too. what was up with daniel sweating so much? and was it me or did his eyes look really freaky? was there a circuit party going on in the green room?

the rest of the looks are below, in the order that i liked them, from left to right. i really liked jerell and stella's design. blayne, teamed with leanne, was blamed for not listening to what was being asked. korto and joe and terri and suede weren't called out on the runway at the end, so i don't have much to say about their looks.

that's my story, and i'm sticking to it. peace out. i hope your thursday goes better than i'm thinking mine will go.

posted by lonestarsteve on wed 13.08.08 11:42 PM

i really enjoyed watching this guy on the last season of american idol. of course he's too old for me, but i look forward to seeing his career develop (and seeing if his father can stay 50 ft away, like it says in the restraining order).

seriously, i think david archuleta's got a lot of honest, god-given talent and he's so very modest about his gift. besides, crazy paula is nuts about him. what else more could he have going for him?

david's just getting his new album under way, but on the first of this month he released his new single, crush. he's also on a u.s. tour now with the other ai performers. he'll be in the bayou city on the 24th.

here's a youtube of david watching his song being played on the radio for the first time. i thought it was cute.

i'm such a fag.

posted by lonestarsteve on tue 12.08.08 8:14 AM

icarus has long been one of my favorite mythical greek characters. The story of his fall from the sky has been caputured and recreated countless times over the years in poetry, sculpture, painting, photography as well as other forms of art (read: circuit parties). left is henri matisse's take on the myth from his jazz series.

as the story goes, wishing to escape from crete, icarus and his father, daedalus, fashioned themselves with pairs of wings made of wax (great idea, by the way). before they took off from the island, icarus' father warned his son not to fly too close to either the sun or the sea.

but icarus, "overcome by the sublime feeling that flying gave him," soared through the sky joyfully, but in the process he came too close to the sun, which melted his wings. icarus then fell to his death in an area which now bears his name, the icarian sea, which lies near icaria, an island southwest of samos.

as many times as this myth has been recreated and reinterpreted by artists, i never tire of seeing its representation. below is photographer françios rousseau's fashion spread that he shot for the september issue of out. i thought it was beautiful, and wanted to share. all photos from out magazine (out, september 2008, issue no. 177, pp. 142-57). enjoy.

posted by lonestarsteve on sun 10.08.08 12:52 PM

oh, how i love you, mr. michael kors!! you silly, silly top american fashion designer! and here i thought you had used up all of your sound bites after season 3! shame on me for ever doubting you! you are still "in" with lonestarsteve.

[sidenote: let me just preface this post by saying that i must apologize for the lack of attention i've been giving lonestarsteve.com lately. i'm still battling some demons, and i've taken to taking some time out each night to write offline just for myself, and i'm also reading a bit more. i did not intend to simply post every thursday after project runway airs like a big bravo tv loser, but that's how things would seem. i'll do better. i promise.]

with that out of the way then, let's grab hold of those "rings of glory" now shall we? it was a good episode. and i thought that other than the two or three designers who missed the mark completely on the challenge, not a one of them made anything resembling a hot mess of an outfit. but with last night's challenge, it was all about getting the concept right.

last night's episode 4 of project runway season 5, entitled "rings of glory," had mentor tim gunn taking the remaining 13 designers on a field trip to the armory track & field training center in washington heights in upper manhattan. [interesting factoid: the armory center contains the largest indoor track in the world. who knew?]

while there, they all met u.s. olympian (speed skater) apolo ohno, who informed them all of their challenge: with one day, and $150, create a womenswear look that could be worn by athletes for the opening ceremony of the summer olympics. designers were then allowed to peruse the national track and field museum, which contained many images of past olympic games to help to give them ideas.

korto won the challenge with the look below. gunn writes in his blog:

"[korto] created an extremely sophisticated look: a white cotton/linen blend pant, a stretch satin camisole, and a white leather vest with red shoulder insets and a black mandarin collar.

" there was an unexpected aspect to the all-white look, and the construction and fit were perfection. furthermore, you could easily see how this look could successfully morph into menswear, which is not an unimportant element in this challenge."

personally, of all the looks, i thought that korto's prodominant use of white—while sleek and sophisticated—didn't effectively convey "united states of america" to me. and just think of all the grass stains. oy! but, i loved her use of the light-weight, red, white & blue leather. way to go!

jennifer, the self-defined "holly-golightly-goes-to-a-salvador-dali-exhibit" designer, was auf'ed. and for good reason. her outfit, more than any other, was simply too immature and too girly. gunn writes:

"oh, i reflect upon our museum visit and jennifer's demise all makes sense to me: she saw the historical images (some of them being adorable dresses that looked like they were going to a garden party) and she saw the "nike" refrain (the flying foot of the greek goddess who personifies victory) and became entranced.

"jennifer designed a gold and white striped high-waisted skirt (with an odd "purse" on the back, i'll add) and paired it with a navy shrunken jacket with the museum's nike symbol appliquéd in sequins on each lapel. Yes, it was a touch of schiaparelli, but the whole look was too girly and too child-like."

i completely agree with tim. there was no red used, except very subtle uses in the appliqued collar. i can just hear the other countries now: "you americans here to play bridge, or throw discus?" holly may go lightly, but she ain't going to the olympic games. word.

korto: what a sophisticated look.	jennifer: garden party, anyone?

tim had some great things to say about the others in his blog. totally worth checking out. no time to write about each look, but there were some very, very good outfits. some of my favorite moments from last night's episode include:

001 :: while shopping at mood for fabric, terri had pulled a bolt out to look at, and when she was gone to look for some more, our salt-lake-city boy keith took it as his own. she wasn't havin' it. she said, "a sista gotta keep one eye open, that's all i'm sayin'."

002 :: when joe came in to the sewing room and yelled at daniel for rethreading "his" reserved machine. what balls for a straight guy. honestly.

003 :: lucky for daniel that jennifer's look was so off the mark. he was second in line to be auf'ed. heidi said that he had missed the point of the challenge, giving them "a sad, purple cocktail dress." priceless!

004 :: when michael kors said of daniel's attempt at an olympic opening ceremony outfit: "if her sport is drinking, then it's a good dress."

posted by lonestarsteve on thu 07.08.08 7:18 AM

before we dive right in to last night's episode, there's a 900-lb gorilla in the room—albeit a pink one—that no one from the cast seems to be talking about. we must discuss this right away.

last night's episode of project runway, episode 3, entitled "bright lights/big city," opened with a suspiciously brief interview with designer daniel feld saying that he missed his "roomie" wesley nault, who was auf'ed after last week's challenge.

what this blogger didn't realize until this morning was that according to an article written last thursday by people magazine and then later picked up by reality tv world (and then picked up by everyone else with a blog site, a pulse, and an internet connection), nault, 23, confirmed that he may have been auf'ed by heidi and the other judges, but that he's still in with fellow season 5 designer feld, 25.

people mag quotes nault as saying: "we met on the show. and we tried to keep it very professional on the show because we were both there for our careers, and we didn't expect this to come out of it. but i'm really happy."

the article goes on to say that speculation about the relationship began online after online fashion bloggers—the uber-sleuths that they are—noted that both designers listed that they were "in a relationship" on their myspace pages. oh, and at the top of their "top friends lists?" each other. wesley is daniel's top friend, and daniel is wesley's. ok? mystery solved. moving on...

last night's episode had the remaining 14 designers—or, as i lovingly like to refer to them: 5 girls, 8 real girls, and 1 straight guy—doning rain ponchos and rubber boots and riding atop a stacked nyc tour bus for a "night out on the town," hosted by mentor tim gunn. stops were made at columbus circle, times square, ny public library, and greenwich village. at each stop, a small grouping of designers armed with digital cameras were dropped off to take photos of inspirational new york city nightlife that would later be used as each designers' muse for their outfits.

kenley won last night. in my humble opinion, as talented as i think kenley is, i thought her dress was just "ok." gunn tended to agree, as he writes in his blog about the decision:

"i'm happy for [kenley], but i'm still scratching my head over her design. the judges described her look as "ungaro meets lacroix" and they were right, but is that a good thing? the silhouette channeled ungaro, while the textiles—a riotous green print and strawberry-to-grape ombred tulle—evoked lacroix. i thought it looked very costumey, too costumey, and even [episode 3 guest judge] sandra bernhard stated, 'i have difficulties with this look. I don't get it.' admittedly, this look isn't for everyone! kenley, congratulations on your win and on your immunity for the next challenge."

kenley: you have won this challenge.	emily: you are out. auf wiedersehen.

auf'ed last night was emily. i thought that, again, even as talented as she is, her look was most unfortunate. and i truly think she probably should have taken the advice of mentor gunn to take the dress to another level. gunn writes:

"i was concerned about [emily's] look from the moment of my first visit to her workspace. the black sheath was constructed with some problematic darts at the hips, and the multicolored flounces of ruffled fabric were awkwardly placed and looked like a stuck on afterthought. she was confident that her design was strong enough to survive the possibility of a runway pummeling. regrettably, the design didn't."

overall, lonestarsteve has to tell you that so far lonestarsteve has been really, really impressed with all of the designers. there is one designer, however, that lonestarsteve has problems watching. in fact, lonestarsteve predicts he may be auf'ed next. can you guess to whom lonestarsteve might be referring? hmmmm? lonestarsteve ... lonestarsteve ... lonestarsteve?

watch out, mr. suede. suede could just be next...

posted by lonestarsteve on thu 31.07.08 7:19 AM

i've been having a bit of a rough go of things lately, heathwise, so to help lift my spirits i've been trying to concentrate on the positive. a lot of the positive in my life comes from music. lately i've gotten my itunes and ipod whipped back into shape and amassed quite a new collection of albums from various artists, some from my past, some new to me.

one band in particular i've been jamming to lately i saw a while back (apr. 23) on david letterman. (it's funny looking at the video now because i realize just how horse the lead singer was at the time. they must have had a string of gigs before doing letterman.)

they are called tokyo police club and their second album, elephant shell, i am completely in love with.

tpc is a very young, canadian indie rock band hailing from newmarket, ontario. tpc band members—all early twentysomethings—are: vocalist and bassist dave monks, guitarist and percussionist josh hook, keyboardist and vocalist graham wright, and drummer greg alsop.

monks once described the band's sound as "wide-eyed post-punk with a tendency to get over-excited." that description fits.

wright wrote a recent blog entry about elephant shell...

"second albums are difficult. you’re supposed to ‘grow’ or ‘mature’, but you’re also supposed to ‘honour your roots’. i think i understand the dreaded sophomore slump now. it's what happens when you try to please everyone. we have no idea how to please anyone except ourselves, and thats what we’ve done with elephant shell. i don’t know how you’ll feel about it. but i’ll tell you how i feel about it. bear in mind that i am just the keyboardist, so you can take whatever i say with a grain of salt.

"[our first album,] a lesson in crime was was a record for friday nights. it was the record you would throw on at the party with twenty of your friends, the record that everyone could get up and dance to. it was quick and immediate and to the point. but when the party's over, and you’re giving a ride home to the girl you have a crush on, thats when you put elephant shell on. it's the record that you listen to when you’re driving around town in the dark, wondering if she likes you, wondering if you should have tried to flirt more, or less.

"so many of my favorite records still give me that nostalgic feeling, the feeling of falling in love with girls and with music and with life. maybe thats stupid. it sure looks stupid, now that i type it out. but it really is how i feel, and elephant shell makes me feel the same way.

"don’t worry, we haven’t gone sappy on you. you can still dance to this record. greg's still bringing the sweet beats. you can still turn it the hell up and blast it from your car. i hope you do those things. at the end of the day, its just a record, and you can listen to it however you want. but it means a lot to me, and i hope it means something to you, too."

i like almost ever song on the album, but my favorite song by far is in a cave. enjoy.

posted by lonestarsteve on wed 30.07.08 8:25 AM

the pattern of greatness continued last night with episode 2 of season 5 of one of my most favoritest shows in the whole wide world—the show that dare not speaketh its own name—and let me just tell you, it's not easy being green.

or let's just say that it wasn't so easy for wesley. so sorry to see him go. such wonderful eye candy. but looks and youth aren't everything, right stella?

so, last night's challenge was entitled "grass is always greener" and enlisted the help of brilliant young actress natalie portman to judge the remaining 15 designers' use of environmentally conscious fabrics to make cocktail dresses for their own models. catch was that it was the models themselves who went to new york fabric outlet, mode, to choose and purchase materials. bad idea.

winning the challenge was none other than 37-year-old suede from seven hills, ohio. suede goes only by his first name, which i'm sure is his real christian name, and he'll be the first to tell you so. in third-person, no less.

auf'd was none other than our boy wesley, a 23-year-old wunderkind from blackstone, massachusetts. nina garcia said of his design: "shiny, tight, and short is the quickest way ot look cheap." thanks for the tip, nina. i'll have to remember that.

and thanks for the memories, wesley. upon his departure, designers' mentor tim gunn was quoted as saying: "wesley, we barely got to know you, and we're going to miss you. i'm going to have to ask you to go clean out your workspace. and don't even think about stopping by the TRESemme hair studio or the L'Oreal makeup room for a 5-finger discount, you hear me? don't test me, boy. i know more polysyllabic words than your sweet, young mind could ever wrap itself around, and i'm not averse to utilizing them. don't make me have to caucus with the producers. i just didn't get your dress. it didn't 'wow' nina, and you bored the other judges. besides, you didn't mitigate what i told you to mitigate, and you didn't make it work. in the end, it was a lot of look."

suede: your dress will be sold on bluefly.com.	wesley: your dress will be sold on barfly.com.

wesley took the whole thing in stride and was extremely mature. i guess he's going to have to put his love affair with fellow designer daniel on hold. ah, young love. ain't it grand?

shiny...	tight...	and short.

unlike seasons of the past, bravo tv has provided a preview "teaser" for each episode on its web site. i've replicated the list below. a bit of a spoiler alert, by the way, which is so unusual for the show and for bravo to do.

	episode 1, aired july 16 "let's start from the beginning" in the first episode of the emmy-nominated creative competition series, the 16 designers are forced to think outside the box and construct an outfit from unconventional materials. guest judge: austin scarlett
	episode 2, aired july 23 "grass is always greener" the designers are forced to think green in the second episode of project runway—with the help of their trusted model. guest judge: natalie portman
	episode 3, airs july 30 "bright lights/big city" when the sun sets over the big apple, the real fashion of new york comes to life. the designers use the city as their muse. guest judge: sandra bernhard
	episode 4, airs august 6 "rings of glory" it's time to learn who deserves the gold. the contestants must design an outfit for the world's largest sporting competition, inspired by one of its most decorated participants. guest judge: apolo ohno
	episode 5, airs august 13 "welcome to the jungle" the workplace can be a jungle. inspired by a hit tv show, the project runway designers help working women dress the part. guest judge: brooke shields
	episode 6, airs august 20 "good queen fun" in this sixth episode of bravo's project runway, the designers let loose when a queen drops by for the day. guest judge: rupaul
	episode 7, airs august 27 "fashion that drives you" fashion doesn't always have to be conventional. the remaining designers get revved up for their materials in this challenge. guest judge: rachel zoe
	episode 8, airs september 3 "double-o fashion" the contestants must create a look inspired by the fall collection of a fashion icon of this decade. guest judge: diane von furstenberg
	episode 9, airs september 10 "what's your sign?" the designers team up to create a garment around the astrological sign of their partner. the designers are taken off-site to receive inspiration from the stars. guest judge: francisco costa
	episode 10, airs september 17 "transformation" growing up is hard to do, but the designers get their own lesson in sophistication as they help reinvent college-aged women for entry into the working world. guest judge: cynthia rowley
	episode 11, airs september 24 "rock n' runway" the designers tune in to their musical side for a musical genre challenge. guest judge: ll cool j
	episode 12, airs october 1 "nature calls" drawing inspiration from nature, the remaining designers head to the great outdoors to design an outfit of their choosing. guest judge: tba
	episode 13, airs october 8 "finale, part i" it's down to the final thread as the designers prepare to take to the tents to compete in a two-part finale to determine who will be the next winner of project runway. guest judge: tba
	episode 14, airs october 15 "finale, part ii" with every last stitch in place, it's time to discover who has made the final cut on bravo's project runway. guest judge: tba

posted by lonestarsteve on thu 24.07.08 7:41 AM

i've only been back at work now for one day since my trip to the great white north, and already i need a vacation. the trip went well, though. i think the powers-that-be were happy with the turnout, anyway.

good thing project runway season 5 has started, giving me good reason to live. i wasn't able to view the premier episode last wednesday while in canada. go figure that bravo for the u.s. doesn't air up there. such conceded bastards, those canadians, eh? what a bunch of hosers. that's all i'm sayin'.

top 10 things that "steve needs..."

... to find a squirrel hitman.
... a big ol' life insurance policy.
... sleep.
... the money.
... it.
... help.
... and greeds.
... to stop grand-standing with his smoke-and-mirror shows and focus on business development, alliances, and affordability.
... a hurricane.
... a shave (and therapy).

truer words have never been spoken

posted by lonestarsteve on tue 22.07.08 7:53 AM

despite the u.s. dollar losing its value by the day, never underestimate the magical healing power of a good, serious bout of retail therapy, especially when it's been one of those months. you know what i'm talking about? i thought you might.

posted by lonestarsteve on tue 08.07.08 7:05 AM

f*ck me pumps	f*ck me at the pump

posted by lonestarsteve on wed 02.07.08 6:16 AM

i'm feeling like such a debbie downer lately...

you're enjoying your day
everything's going your way
then along comes debbie downer

always there to tell you 'bout a new disease
a car accident or killer bees
you'll beg her to spare you, "debbie, please!"
but you can't stop debbie downer!

top 6 debbie downer good time-thwarters:

001 :: "ever since they found mad cow disease in the u.s., i'm not taking any chances. it can live in your body for years before it ravages your brain."

002 :: "wow, you guys, disney world really is fun. it makes me feel like a kid again. i mean, the time before my 2-year stint at children's hospital."

003 :: "speaking of heat, if this greenhouse effect keeps up we'll all be living underwater."

004 :: "by the way, it's official… i can't have children!"

005 :: "slather up the sunscreen… i had a mole looked at recently and the doctor told me that due to the extent of its irregular borders i'm flirting with a melanoma."

006 :: feline a.i.d.s. is the no. 1 killer of domestic cats."

posted by lonestarsteve on tue 01.07.08 8:11 AM

i definitely think i've got lighthouse on the brain. wait a minute. those aren't ...

are they kidding me with this sh*t? i know a candy-maker who's out of a job this morning. sheesh!

timmy :: mommy, mommy! i like the gummi lighthouses that have more girth than length! those feel the best in my mouth!

mommy :: yes, timmy, i know you do. just don't tell your father.

posted by lonestarsteve on tue 24.06.08 7:51 AM

i'm sure not many who visit here know this, but i'm tracking you. well, actually, "tracking" is just a tad bit harsh and slightly untrue. let's just say that i'm aware of what many of you were searching for online before you found me here. (don't worry. i'm speaking in a very broad sense here. it's not like i could track what each and every individual out there was searching for on the internet. or could i?)

you remember that moment though, don't you, gentle reader? when you excitedly filled-in your string of keywords in the search field on google.com, then clicked "search," (or: "i'm feeling lucky, miss jackson," if you're nasty), and then followed your search to this page, to lonestarsteve.com. it was then that you said, "what the hell? this isn't what i wanted! how the hell did i get here from: "nick lachey crowbar foot massage peanut butter and jelly."

(that's what she said.)

alas, since i have your attention anyway—and just to do homage to some of things that you really wanted to view and read about—i've compiled this little list of the top 8 things you were searching for on the internet that lead you to me, lonestarsteve. please enjoy. and happy hunting, you freaks. (you know i love you more than my luggage).

.:top 8 keyword searches that lead you to me :.

001 :: "eddie cibrian."
this is by far the most-searched keyword string that pulls cyber-searchers in this direction. it's funny because i wrote about cibrian way back in december 2005 when he was starring on abc as sexy park ranger russel varon in a science-fiction drama called invasion. the show sucked, but it had cibrian in almost every scene, so i watched it, sick, dimented f*ck that i am.

he never did take off his shirt though. not even once. i don't know where this picture of him is from, but who cares? cibrian has done a handful of movies, but is probably best known for his guest spots on tv.

most recently, i saw cibrian on abc's ugly betty playing coach diaz, the gym teacher of betty's nephew, justin. he catches the eye of betty's older sister, hilda. and, yes, this time his shirt comes off. can i have a "thank you, jesus!"

002 :: "steve needs."
i can't believe that people still actually search using this keyword search formula. wasn't this google trick established way back when the internet was invented by al gore in 2000? spare me...

003 :: "deepthroat x-ray."
this refers to a photo that i posted back in june 2006. i'm not going to re-post the photo here, however, but if you have never seen it, it's in the archives.

004 & 005 :: "jonathan jesensky" and "eloi eloi lama sabachthani tattoo."
these two keyword search strings refer to my numerous postings about one of my all-time favorite models, jonathan jesensky (aka jonathan west, for all those diehard gay, bi, and trisexual porn fans out there).

i have two framed photos of jonathan in my apartment that were taken by photographer steve henry. jesensky also has a web site that links to more photos here.

it wasn't until october 2006, believe it or not, that i even knew who jonathan was. he is immediately recognizable—even when his head is cropped out of any photo—due to his distinctive tatoo above his navel that says: "eloi eloi lama sabachthani", or "my god, my god, why have your forsaken me?" there's probably a reason for the tattoo, but i've never discovered it.

006 :: "kelly lebrock."
i wrote about kelly also in october 2006 when i was disturbed by the fact that ms. lebrock had let herself go so badly and was now starring on one of those celebrity weight-loss shows. i think she's since lost the extra weight. if so, good for her. if not, there's always weird science 2: return from the fat farm.

007 :: "andrew johann salgado."
i was introduced to this talented young canadian artist in november 2004 when a very close friend gave me a hand-drawn rendering of tori amos for my birthday. the image is amazing, as is the artist.

in this work, tori's face is actually composed of an original hand-written script that is painstakingly repeated to 'carve' the contours of tori's face. the piece is called suitcase: bats&love (a lesson in ethicism).

the poem is this: "...like an unborn fetus, or maybe the yolk of an egg, unfertilized. waiting to hatch before my alligator mother. i will have to be vicious. ferocious. an angry piece of flesh. i must fend for myself and prepare for the clink of sterilized silver-pharma-ware. the earth like a needle. people's blood made of nylon, teflon, rayon, and carbon. i'll dance with gold pom-poms. i'll give you my mortgage. i'll give you my pc my tv my ac. they'll fight to be racy. i watch them destroy the glass in their doors. although i am afraid i dig up potatoes and eat crushed red mangoes."

008 :: "johnny please please, stop pretending."
this phrase, of course, comes from george michael's song, cars and trains. i wrote them first in june 2006. they are listed again below.

cars and trains

mama's gone and got herself a new man
it's a shame, he's the same
mama please please, stop pretending
this time, it won't end in tears
i find myself, with a new daddy
my mama needs love you see
guess she don't wanna be lonely

and nobody's keeping score
i don't say hi to those guys no more
said mama can't you feel me
holding my breath as they knock, knock,
knock on our door

you're just taking your ass
to the top of that building
throwing yourself under cars and trains
taking the pill that you know will kill you
under the wheels,
the same, the same ...

johnny's gone and got himself a new man
he gets laid, every day
johnny please please, stop pretending
this time, may just end in tears
take care of yourself
because you won't find 'daddy'
when you're popping those pills
oh johnny, is the danger just part of the thrill?

and nobody's keeping score
johnny those guys that you shake it for
i said, "johnny can't you hear them
saying mama knows best as they knock, knock,
knock on your door"

you're just taking your ass
to the top of that building
throwing yourself under cars and trains
taking the pill that you know will kill you
under the wheels, the same, the same

taking your ass to the top of that building
throwing yourself under cars and trains
taking the pill that you know will kill you
under the wheels, wheels, wheels

pretty girl, little girl,
what were you thinking
just 18 at the time
you were a mother and child, at the same time
you were a mother and child
so young and fucked up baby
always higher than a child should see...
forgive me

to the top of that building
under cars and trains
taking the pill that you know will kill you
under the wheels, wheels, wheels

mama don't you let him stay
from bastard to loser, hurt you, used you in every way,
mama, don't you let him stay, please
don't let him stay
i said jesus, mary, and the saints above,
won't you show him love?

-- lyrics by george michael

posted by lonestarsteve on mon 23.06.08 7:15 AM

watched kathy griffin on bravo last night. she's back for yet-another season of my life on the d-list. so glad she's back for another season. she always makes me pee my pants.

with emmy in tow from last season, kathy's latest scheme is to win a grammy—or at the very least, be nominated for a grammy.

she just released what might be her first comedy album, for your consideration. it's a recording of a live show in tracy, california. you can buy it on itunes. it's $9.99. not that i know.

good luck, kathy. i wish you all the best with your award. keep making me laugh.

posted by lonestarsteve on fri 20.06.08 7:58 AM

so, i will be entertaining out-of-town guests starting next week. actually, they are not so much guests as they are biological family.

you see, since moving here to the bayou city at the end of 1995, my family has only come to visit me from pennsyltucky twice.

once, in 1998, a year after my ex and i bought our home, my mom and dad flew down to stay with us. we had a really great time. they used houston as a makeshift hub for 2 weeks worth of excursions: to the grand canyon and las vegas and even new orleans. while they were here, we also drove them to visit san antonio and galveston.

then, in 2002, my older brother came to visit solo, without his girlfriend. i think he had fun. his visit corresponded with the very peak of a very difficult time in my life—and a very drunk and high time in my life—so i don't recall much about it. all i remember was that it was pride week, and we took him to see the gay freaks parade down the street and i half remember abandoning him and my ex because i had scored some coke.

good times.

but this visit should be a great one. he's married now, and he and his child bride will be swinging through houston-town on their way back from this music festival. (yes, they be likin' their reggae music, mon). i intend to give them a big ol' slice of lonestarsteve's houston, for better or worse. hell, if they have a good enough time, the word might get back to other members of my family and i might have nothing but visits from them throughout 2009.

careful what you ask for.

posted by lonestarsteve on thu 19.06.08 6:59 AM

word of the day for saturday, june 14, 2008

prink \PRINGK\, transitive verb:
1. to dress up; to deck for show.
2. to dress or arrange oneself for show; to primp.

tara has supermodel legs and is already getting used to being prinked and coiffed as she prepares for her first beauty contest in the autumn.—raffaella barker, "diary hatched, matched and almost despatched", daily telegraph, sept. 6, 1997

the point is reinforced by a clutch of contemporary art photos…showing plump nudes prinking and preening like pouter pigeons, and, in one case, a couple of dancers deliberately posed to recreate a degas painting.—hilary spurling, daily telegraph, jan. 23, 1999

prink is probably an alteration of prank, from middle english pranken, "to show off," perhaps from middle dutch pronken, "to adorn oneself," and from middle low german prunken (from prank, "display").

posted by lonestarsteve on mon 16.06.08 7:02 AM

flipping through the channels can be dangerous. the main thing i've discovered is that tv has changed -- changed a lot -- since i was young. hell, it's changed a lot since i graduated college. and not necessarily for the better. examples of this abound, but probably the most profound is the mtv "reality" show shot at v.d., er, i mean, shot at love with tila tequila.

in case you haven't had the pleasure, the premise of the show is simple enough: take 30 twentysomethings -- 15 "straight" men and 15 lesbianese (all with low self esteem and no future job prospects) and allow them to "live" and "interact" with one fiesty, sex- and attention-crazed 26-year-old asian bisexual internet celebrity. sound like fun? well, it sure is.

and just in case you're saying to yourself, "hey, i've heard of this before. wasn't there already a show about all of this?" well, rest assured there's a simple explanation: this season is tila's second shot at love. get it? tila's first shot at love ended. so now she's looking for love for real.

uhm, check please.

press reports state that tila's first shot at love, with 25-year-old film student bobby banhart, ended before the start of the year. you mean, the relationship didn't last? shocking.

so double-t is at it again: looking for love in all the right places. last night aired the next-to-last show of the second season, which featured tequila visiting the hometowns of the final four "contestants." you have to admire her, uhm, stamina.

stay tuned. i'm sure it's going to be another cliff-hanging season ending. fingers crossed for you, tila.

posted by lonestarsteve on wed 11.06.08 8:23 AM

starr doom is taking me to see them tonight. how excited am i?

i wonder how much they will play that i remember from when i was just starting college, and just beginning my gay life.

the last time i saw them was in pennsyltucky. i was only 15 or 16 and was actually slam dancing with my fellow concert-goers.

i didn't follow them much after that since robert always seemed to write about love and women, and that just didn't do it for me.

but i love their free-spiritedness and their spunk and grunginess.

will robert's hair look the same as it always did?

will i be crushed in the mosh pit?

and, most importantly, has my black t-shirt even been laundered?

tune in and find out...

i don't care if monday's blue
tuesday's grey and wednesday too
thursday i don't care about you
it's friday i'm in love

monday you can fall apart
tuesday wednesday break my heart
thursday doesn't even start
it's friday i'm in love

saturday wait
and sunday always comes too late
but friday never hesitate...

i don't care if monday's black
tuesday wednesday heart attack
thursday never looking back
it's friday i'm in love

monday you can hold your head
tuesday wednesday stay in bed
or thursday watch the walls instead
it's friday i'm in love

saturday wait
and sunday always comes too late
but friday never hesitate...

dressed up to the eyes
it's a wonderful surprise
to see your shoes and your spirits rise
throwing out your frown
and just smiling at the sound
and as sleek as a shriek
spinning round and round
always take a big bite
it's such a gorgeous sight
to see you eat in the middle of the night
you can never get enough
enough of this stuff
it's friday
i'm in love

posted by lonestarsteve on mon 09.06.08 7:23 AM

just got back from my biannual trip to pennsyltucky to see my biological family. nothing much has changed here in the bayou city.

it's still hot as hell (and getting hotter) ...

gasoline prices are still creeping above $4 per gallon (and climbing higher)...

and hillary is still campaigning her little pantsuit off (she's such a nutcracker)...

the more things change, the more they stay the same.

forgive me, i've had my fill of coffee for the day.

posted by lonestarsteve on wed 28.05.08 7:30 AM

from the hope of the future: the youth
to the backbone of the party: hard-working white people

posted by lonestarsteve on sun 18.05.08 8:06 PM

this is bonny. she was a cat that used to hang out in the courtyard of my apartment complex. everyone loved her and would watch over her and feed her. she would always call out when she saw me at my door, expecting handouts.

a few years ago, bonny had a sidekick, her brother clyde. bonny and clyde, get it? cute. anyway, clyde was this great black cat who would just jump up on your lap whenever you went out into the courtyard to sit. he was just so mellow. he died a few years ago after getting really sick and really thin. it was sad to see him die in such a way.

i would see bonny more often when i smoked outside on my patio, but over the last 9 months or so after quitting smoking, i didn't really see much of her. i saw enough of her, however, to realize that she had developed some kind of cancer on her ear and was in considerable pain and discomfort.

this week a neighbor took mercy on bonny and had her put down. i think it was the right decision. i will miss her very much. but i know that she was suffering a great deal.

bonny and clyde were not always outside courtyard cats. when i moved in to this complex 5 years ago, i was told that bonny and clyde belonged to a gay guy who lived across the courtyard from where i live now. this guy used to sit outside and smoke and talk to everyone else. very friendly. well, the guy ended up dying from complications due to hiv and aids and when the guy's family came to clean out his apartment, they took everything but bonny and clyde. they just abandoned them in the courtyard. so that's why everyone thought of them as their own cats.

we've had a lot of feral cats come and go, but none will ever match up to bonny and clyde. may they both rest in peace.

posted by lonestarsteve on fri 16.05.08 8:10 AM